I have been meaning to post this for quite awhile for my married and non-married friends. This list is so very true that I don't think anyone could refute it. If you are married, have your husband read it. If you are dating, have your significant other read it. And for my guy friends that aren't married yet: read it, memorize it, and REMEMBER it! Because I guarantee there will come a time when one of these words are uttered and you will find yourself either in a wonderful situation because you read my words, or you will be in deep trouble because you didn't pay attention. And then if you didn't pay attention, you will be wishing you had.
Alright, here is the list!
1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2) Five Minutes- If she is getting ready, this means a half hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to stop playing your video games and to start helping around the house.
3) Nothing- This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should now be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4) Go Ahead- This is a dare, not permission. Whatever you do, DO NOT DO IT!
5) Loud Sigh- This is actually not a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing).
6) That's Okay- This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7) Thanks- A woman is thanking you. Do not question. Just say "you're welcome" UNLESS she says, "Thanks a lot"-- that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say "you're welcome", that will bring on a whatever.
8) Whatever- Is a woman's way of saying "screw you".
9) Don't worry about it, I got it- another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking, "What's wrong?" For the woman's response, refer back to #3.
So, after I read these for Jon he now picks up on the tiniest sigh and asks what's wrong. Even though sometimes my sigh is just that, a sigh. It's pretty funny. Anyway, that's going to be about all for today. As finals are completely over and I'm ready for a nap now. It's funny just how tired pregnancy makes a girl, especially in the third trimester.