~NOT A HINT~

Jon and I had school today and it was pretty fun, my alarm went off at 6 this morning in my beginning of the school year desire to "be better" I decided that I was going to get up at 6 every morning and run on the treadmill and then get ready for school. Guess who wasn't about to get up at six this morning? Yeah, you guessed it, me! I hadn't even gone to bed super late last night but when that alarm went off I hit snooze three consecutive times. And then when it was either get up, shower, and do my hair I decided that sleep was much more important and slept for another ten minutes. Attempted to get up at 6... actually got up at 6:45... and those forty five minutes of extra sleep did wonders!! Jon and I had a VERY FULL day! We were at the school from 8 this morning til 5 this afternoon, after classes were done, we went over to my Grandma Salazar's house to pull weeds for her, but when we got there my cousin Rocky told us not to worry about it and that he would take care of it. So we went in and chatted with Grandma, Aunt Gail, and Uncle Richard. It was so good to see my Uncle Richard again! I have always felt somewhat closer to him than my other uncles and I really enjoy talking to him and spending time with him, so it was like an extra treat to see him! Grandma is doing ok, she is getting up there in years with the fact that she'll be 96 years old in like 2 weeks, and so her body is worn and definitely used, but her mind is so sharp still! She's an amazing woman, with amazing stories and experiences, and one day I want to be just like her! She's been the only grandparent I've had as her husband, my grandpa, and my maternal grandpa died before I was born and my maternal grandmother lived on the other side of the world until I was seven. So whenever the conversation was about grandparents, I thought about her. She has led an incredible life and I only hope that she'll live long enough for me to hear all her stories and for her to at least see some of my children.
After Jon and I were married, because his parents had divorced and his dad remarried he had another set of grandparents and so as of March of this year I went from having one grandma to having three and having two grandpa's! This excited me almost as much as the wedding! My kids will have grandparents who will love them and spoil them! Our children are going to be *hopefully* the first great grandchildren for Jon's side of the family! (And if people are thinking that this is a "hint" think again! Cause it's not!!)

All in all, today was a good day! And even though these next couple of months are going to be hectic... they are going to be fun!

Worth...while??

Have you ever had that feeling when past emotions that you thought you were over have just come flooding back? Well, tonight has been one of those nights; and I can't help but be sad, for silly things that really shouldn't even matter anymore. Most recently is the inexcusable fact that I really am just not important to people who I used to be really good friends with. There is one friend who I used to do everything with! Sing, play the piano, watch movies with, talk on the phone forever, perform with, share everything with. There was even a summer where we went to Lagoon everyday it seemed! And yet, one summer it was like I didn't matter anymore, the things that we used to do together and the laughter and fun times that we had just disappeared. And all of a sudden they were spending time with people that I had introduced them to. People who had been my friends first, and then all of sudden they didn't need me anymore. And at the time it hurt, because I didn't know what I had done to make this change. And as years have gone by I look back and wonder what I did, and I honestly don't know what I did that was so egregious to cause, not just one, but several of people who I had considered to be good friends to completely disregard me. And over the years I have thought less and less of it, and with meeting Jon and dating and getting married I haven't really thought about it at all, until tonight. It's one of those things where I just have to wonder what made it so that I wasn't good enough. And I have to admit I started crying a little bit. Because everyone in their teenage years wants to be loved and accepted, and up until my Senior year in high school I was. And then all of a sudden things changed and I felt like I wasn't important to anybody, and I don't know what brought it up tonight, but it came up in my mind and all of a sudden all of the hurt and all of the sadness that I felt just rushed into my body. I'm glad for the way that things have turned out in my life, but I'm also really sad that it took so long for me to feel loved and accepted by my peers. I remember countless nights crying myself to sleep my Senior year because of lies that were told about me to keep my old friends from spending time with me. And I know that people won't believe me, but it really hurts to know that people had told others these lies, maybe about what I said, or maybe about what I "did". And it really does make me feel sad that in a lot of people's eyes, I just wasn't good enough. Back then I didn't do what I did for me, I did what I did for other people, be it for my parents or my brothers or my friends. There are a lot of things that I enjoyed doing, but never really did for me. And I remember feeling really sad my Senior year, I really didn't have very many friends that I could talk to anymore without them turning around and laughing and joking about my heartfelt statements with one another. I didn't have a lot of trust in my life, which I think is why Jon and I had so many problems early into our relationship. I didn't know how to trust people anymore, and so I didn't know how to trust Jon, even though he hadn't ever done anything to me to prove him any less trustworthy.
I am so grateful for Jon and for the comfort that he gives me, in any situation. I just wanted to be cared about and loved in high school and I didn't really get it until I met Jon. And even now, I see or hear something and it makes me kind of sad to know that I am not included in that, but at the same time it doesn't matter because I do have Jon and I am going to be with him forever and he will never not love me. And so I know that from now on I will be loved and wanted by him; which is all I should want because he is my best friend. Now I'm not saying that I had a horrible Senior year, I'm just saying that I wish a lot of the things that happened just hadn't. And the people who affected me will probably never know and probably not even care if they knew, and so I know that I need to just let it go and not hold these feelings in anymore because it's not affecting them, it's only affecting me. And yet, somehow, letting go just is so hard sometimes. I know I need to do it, because I don't want to be holding onto these sad feelings forever. What I am grateful for is for those friends who did help me my Senior year. The list isn't very big but I am grateful for Pam who was always there for me when I needed to cry or to give me a hug. And I'm grateful for my Sammy who would always let me come down to her apartment in Salt Lake and be my play buddy.
Again, I don't know why that was brought up into my life tonight, I guess that's what late night thinking and facebook will do to a person: bring up old memories that really don't matter anymore. One thing I can say about it is that I definitely would not be the person I am today if i hadn't had those experiences in high school. I know that I will NEVER leave anyone out because I know how it feels to not be wanted, and I don't want to bring that pain on anyone. I also know that if I hadn't been left out for the majority of my Senior year I wouldn't be as talented on the piano, when I was home all the time I would just play the piano. I would play and sing and then I could be somewhat strong and pretend that none of it was happening. I also know that when I get older I'll be able to help others and give advice about how it won't matter after the fact. Because what happened doesn't matter, I found my eternal companion, I am still the same person with the same goals and ambitions. And I know now that it doesn't matter what other people say about you, be it your friends, your enemies, your frenimes or your own family, nothing anybody says can affect you the way that you can affect yourself.

Ok, now I'm just rambling. It's late, late nights will do that to you. And I'm going to go to bed. A little venting session was just what I needed. :)

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!

Today was Jon's and my first day of classes! We went to bed relatively early last night (well, I guess I should say earlier than we usually went to sleep) and my alarm went off this morning at 6. And I heard it and knew I wasn't getting up, so I put it on snooze... and then it went off a couple more times... and then finally at about 6:30 I got up and did my hair and got ready. Jon got up about ten minutes after I did and then we left for school. Our first class is at 8 and so we decided to leave at 7 because we didn't know what traffic would be like getting down there. And we got down there with like a half hour left before classes. And I have to say that as much as I hate getting up early I definitely enjoy having our pick of parking! We went to our first class which is History, and I have to admit I was a little nervous because I'd heard that our History Teacher was a little boring, but I actually really enjoyed talking to him. He was really nice, obviously I haven't had an actual lesson/lecture from him, but everyday speaking he seems cool. After that we went to our Psychology class, and it was interesting. We had to do this activity, and she said "Pair up with someone you don't know." and then the next thing you know everyone had already paired up and so Jon and I were left with each other, which obviously we don't have a problem with but we do know each other quite well. Anyway, we ended up getting a third party to our little group and so it was ok. After class, we went to our next class which is Communications, and our teacher is really funny. I really like her a lot! She was reading the role and she got to my name and called "Brittney Mosher" and I said here and then she read, "Jon Mosher" and then she looked up and asked if we were related and we told her we were married, and she got very excited and was like, "OH! That's wonderful! You'll really use this for your marriage!" It was funny. Then after, Jon and I parted ways and went to our one class that is different. I went to Sociology and Jon went to his Computer Class. We both had fun in our classes, my teacher is originally from New York and used to work Social Work cases on the families in Harlem and such. It was really interesting listening to her experiences, especially since Social Work is what I'm trying to go in to. I want to help kids out of hard/bad situations, and I want to be able to counsel families in putting their lives back together. On Friday, Jon and I will go to a Friday Forum Institute Class and then on Monday's we will go to our Film and Culture Class. Overall, I'm excited to do this, especially with Jon.

THRILLED!!

Jon and I start school on Wednesday!! We are extremely excited!! Especially for our Film class! We have Prof Frank Gerrish, who played a part in my absolute favourite movie of all time: Rigoletto!! I'm totally gonna ask if we can watch that movie in class!

Also, this morning my mother bought me my very first laptop!! I'm using it right now and couldn't be more thrilled. It's really nice and now I don't have to "borrow" Jon's anymore! Cause I have my very own!!

I have a meeting with Clearfield City today at 2 to talk about the October Show. I'm really excited for that!!

Well I know this post isn't very long but that's ok. It's just a small update!

Trip to the South!

Yesterday Jon and I went on a trip down south! Originally, we were going to go to Vernal for my friends Wedding Reception and then go to the Vernal Temple to take that off of our list! But upon further and probably more focused looking on her invitation I realized that the reception was on Saturday... the 13th... and yesterday was the 18th... so I missed it by five days! I felt so bad! But I wouldn't have been able to go anyway because Nunsense was still running. So we decided that we would go to Levan, which is where his 4th great grandpa Jacob Hofheins founded and is buried and then we would go around the state park and go to Manti to go to the temple there and then come home. It was a fun little day trip that we planned. :) Well, on Wednesday, I went to get my temple recommend out of my bag, and it wasn't there. I was so freaked out for a bit because I had no idea where it would be if not in my bag and not in Jon's suit jacket which I had already checked. Finally, my mum told me to call the last temple I'd been to, so I called the Salt Lake Temple that we'd been to two weeks previous. And after being transferred about four different times I finally got in contact with the main desk and my relief was so great when the man on the other line said, "Boy, do I have some good news for you! It's here." I thanked him and then mum and I left right then to go down and get it. So then I was finally ready to leave for our trip down south the next day.

Jon and I set our alarm for 8:12 so that we could leave at 9. And that was probably the hardest thing for us! Keep in mind that we both start school next Wednesday and our first class is at 8... in the morning! I'm scared... anyway, we got ready and then got in the car to leave for our little adventure! We stopped at Maverick and Jon went in and got drinks while I filled up my little car with gas. We then got on the freeway and headed south on I-15. Our first stop was in Levan Utah. Now for people who don't know where that is, it is a very small town just past Nephi, which is a small town past Payson... actually all of those towns are very small. Anyway, so we stopped in Levan and took pictures (which I'll post later) and then proceeded to go to the cemetery. We searched that entire place and couldn't find Jacob Hofheins grave! We knew he was there because there was a memorial on the grounds for members of the Armed Forces who were buried there. And Jacob Hofheins was a veteran of the Mexican War, according to the memorial. We also know that he was a Captain in the Mormon Battalion. But with the help of the grounds keeper we finally found his grave and took pictures by it too. An interesting story about our families is that my distant great grandpa Antonio Salazar was living in Colorado when a wagon train came in that was being led by a Captain of the Mormon Battalion, and that Captain is the one who gave him the Book of Mormon which eventually led to his conversion and the conversion of his family that has been passed down to me. And while reading through Jacob Hofheins journals we found out that he was leading a wagon train to Utah, and fell ill in Colorado about the same time and area that my grandpa was in. So we don't know for sure, but we think that it may have been Jon's great grandpa to give my great grandpa The Book of Mormon, and in doing that may have played a huge role in Jon's and my marriage. So it was really exciting to see the grave of the man who may have introduced the church into my family.

After we had been to the cemetery, Jon and I got back in the car and made our way to the Manti Temple! It was beautiful, and we had such a good time! Jon and I served as the Witness Couple and every new room that we went in took our breath away, everything was so pretty and it was so hard to imagine the Saints who built the Temple so long ago spending that much time to make it so beautiful! The paintings and carvings and etchings were so exquisite and they all seemed so perfect! Later, after the session we were given a little tour by a member of the Temple Presidency and he gave us a lot of interesting facts about the temple and the people who built it.

All in all, yesterday was a very fun experience and we had so much fun with each other and spending all that time together. We enjoyed ourselves thoroughly and are so excited for when we get the chance to do it again!

Another thing that is really exciting is yesterday I got a call from Clearfield City and because Andrew had to move so suddenly, they no longer had someone to direct the October Show. And so I put in my resume and they called yesterday to tell me that I got the job! I am so excited! This will be my first full length show that I will be directing and I'm really nervous but very excited! I have a lot of people who are rooting for me and so hopefully I'll do a good job. I have a meeting on Monday about all the particulars and then we will have auditions on the 10th of September and hopefully start rehearsals the Tuesday after. So STOKED!!

Nun Fun is Done...

Ok, so Monday was our very last performance of Nunsense. And what a joy ride that was!! There were so many things that happened that we really had no control over and because of the atmosphere of the show, we really could do whatever we wanted about whatever went wrong. There was one scene when Heather as Sister Leo went to answer the phone and the cord just came right out, I couldn't help but laugh! And I figured if something like that happened my character would laugh anyway. Another moment that was funny was in the middle of Alyn and Kathy's number, Kathy swallowed a bug! There were so many gnats everywhere it was ridiculous. So not only did we have to deal with the huge A june bugs but we had to deal with these nasty gnats! Kathy and Alyn ended up stopping the song because they couldn't keep going with Kathy just swallowing a bug. And then they picked up again, and the last thing on my mind right now is when we were doing the kitchen scene and a june bug landed right on my hands. These bugs kamakazi down onto the set and all we can do is step and kick them! It's awful, and so I couldn't help but scream when it landed on me! Apart from all of the funny things that happened, there were a bunch of mishaps, and also a bunch of tender moments.
I've learned a lot from this show actually. More than I thought I would. One of the biggest things that I learned was you really don't know what is going on in someones life to make them do the things they do. One of the nights before the show opened, our director was someone short with me, which he apologized for later, and at the time it hurt my feelings and made me really not want to do this anymore. I came home and just cried to Jon for a couple hours but then I thought better of it and realized that he was just really stressed because we were so close to opening and he'd been busy. It wasn't until later that I found out that he was in the middle of making a huge decision that would impact his career, his future and his family in uprooting them from here in Utah with their families so close to moving himself, his wife and his baby to Louisiana to accept a job at one of the University's. I'm going to miss them dearly as Kathy, his wife, was one of my Nun Sisters and I've worked with Andrew on multiple occasions and he's given me multiple opportunities to expand my talents.

Another thing that I have learned was that you don't leave when you still are on the job. Our set designer, who used to be one of my dearest friends, really disappointed me this time. And I'm not saying that he's never disappointed me but this one, I think, hurt the worse. All the other times it's been me that he's hurt but this time it was our entire cast. Being our set designer he built our entire set, but then on Friday he left for Disneyland. Now, the fact that he left for Disneyland isn't the issue. The issue is that he left for Disneyland when we weren't done until Monday and we still had to strike the set. And then from Sunday to Monday there was a terrible windstorm that blew down one of our walls, and it was bad. And when we probably needed him the most to be there to help fix what happened, he wasn't there. And I just think that that is so sad, because I've known him for several years, and at one point in time we were best friends and he used to be so much more responsible than that. But because he is so good at what he does he's let it go to his head. If it had been me that he'd hurt it wouldn't be as big of a deal but the fact that he hurt the entire cast is what hurts me the most and the fact that he got paid for this. Jon was there every night and did more in setting up and fixing the wall that broke and striking and just being there to support and do whatever needed to be done all because he loves me. It just kinda makes me sad to think that our set designer essentially got paid to go to Disneyland, and my husband got nothing except his name in a program for all the work he did. Anyway, mox nix.


Today was a really fun night for Jon and I! I got a text on Monday night from Jon saying, "Sweety, I am so so so so sorry" and so I called him and asked what had happened, thinking that it was gonna be something horrible and he just said, "I meant to get you flowers after work but then I came to help fix the wall and then I forgot about them." And I couldn't help but laugh, as much as it is a sweet gesture to get me flowers I told him that he really didn't need to and that it was ok. He still felt bad and promised me a "night on the town". Which is what tonight was! We doubled with Nate and the girl he's dating, Heather, and we went to Mongolian Grill which was fantastic like usual and then we went to the pet stores and looked at kitties!! (I love kitties and am aspiring to be a crazy cat lady for anyone who wants to know!) Then we bought a new toy for my baby, Pantomime and then we came home and played with her. She was really weary of it at first and then she warmed up to it and now she LOVES it!! Afterwhich we went to see Captain America! And I have to say, if you have not seen this movie, go and see it! It was so good!! And I loved it, there were a bunch of awesome one liners in there that really made Jon and I laugh! We really enjoyed it. All in all, today was an awesome day and I am more in love with my sweetie that I was before... if that is at all possible!? He is so amazing and so incredible, and I have never been loved so much as I have by him. He is the perfect man for me and I am so grateful that he is mine!

Wedding Video Trailer! :)

Ok! So the photographer and videographer for my wedding has been my best friend since Jr. High. She moved to New Jersey about a year and a half ago and kinda stumbled into weddings. She and her fiancee flew out from New Jersey to take pictures of my wedding and do the wedding video as a wedding present to me. I hadn't seen her for almost a year by the time she flew out for the wedding, and so not only was it an emotional time because I was getting married, it was an emotional time because that little void in my heart that occurred once she left was filled. Of course our visit was cut way too short and I only saw her for about three days and then Jon and I left on our honeymoon and she and Chris went back to New Jersey. We are in the process of figuring out schedules and such for us to make a trip out there to visit them!

Anyway, they finished the wedding video trailer. So there will still be a lot more but this is my wedding video. All you have to do is go to www.allurestudiosNYC.com and click on the portfolios/films and then it will take you to another page that will have Brittney and Jon trailer. Click on that and then you can see the wedding trailer! I loved it. It made me cry, and it brought back all of the feelings and emotions of the day, and it just made me so happy! And I am so grateful for such amazing and talented friends!

Remember to come see Nunsense!! Opening on Thursday at 7:30 at the Clearfield Amphitheatre!

Tweety Bird and Batman!

Wow! Where has this week gone? I swear it was just the other day that Jon and I were driving in the car the blew up and then I cut off all my hair!
So, a ton has happened this week and I will try my hardest to keep it short!
SUNDAY- July 31, 2011
This was the day that my dear dear friend has his farewell talk! Tyler O'bagy has been one of my dearest friends since Jr. High! He was just a 'little' seventh grader when I was in my Freshman year. I was a TA for Mr. Dallinga, the science teacher, and Tyler and a whole bunch of other sevies would come in and spend their lunch hour with me. Tyler also was a part of Drama Club and actually played my boyfriend in "Bye, Bye Birdie" when I played Kim MacAfee and he played Hugo Peabody! I hadn't seen much of Tyler since graduating but when I saw that he has received his mission call and had sent out an invite to his farewell, I told Jon that he didn't have a choice and that we were going to listen to him speak! He did an awesome job and I was crying by the end of his message. He was called to the Scotland/Ireland mission and I know that he will be an amazing missionary to the people of my motherland.
MONDAY- August 1, 2011
We played with Scot all day, which was way fun! Scot is my nephew but because his parents are divorced and both work he stays with us during the day, and so he's grown up like he was my little brother. He is such a sweet kid and I love him so much! And we really should play with him more often, you see, Scot has high functioning autism, and so sometimes he can be annoying because he doesn't know when to stop. He is a bright, happy kid who is very intelligent but socially he's not on the same level as kids his age. And because he is different there are a lot of kids who don't like him and won't play with him. And so he gets lonely, which is why Jon and I try really hard to play with him a lot. He LOVES Jon! So much, and he loves watching him play video games and is always telling Jon random tid bits of info from different games.
TUESDAY- August 2, 2011
Jon and I got our acceptance letters to SLCC, we decided that we are going to finish out our generals there and then move onto a university. We are so so so excited to go to school together and help each other out. We are really looking forward to starting school on August 24!
WEDNESDAY - August 3, 2011
We went to the Salt Lake Temple, it was a really good session, even though it was freakishly huge and I had to sit in the back! I hate hate hate sitting in the back of anything, and it all stems back to fifth grade when I didn't know I needed glasses, and Mrs. Shepherd would write questions on the board; well, I couldn't see the writing and so I would just copy the questions from Andy Muglestons paper and then answer them myself. And then I got in trouble until I told her I couldn't see the board and then I had to go to the eye doctor and get glasses. Anyway, after the temple we went to SLCC to take our Accuplacer. And then after that was over, we were on our way home and Jon stopped at the Hostess Store in Layton. Now, for any of you who know me really well, you will know that bread makes me so happy. I LOVE BREAD!!! I shouldn't, but I do. And we walked into this heavenly mecca that I hadn't even the foggiest idea was there and the smell of bread just wafted over us and I knew that this was my newly found happy place. First is the nail salon and now second is the bread store!
THURSDAY- August 4, 2011
Jon and I registered for our classes!! We are taking 16 credit hours and we have four classes together and one not. We are taking history, psychology, sociology, and a movie analysis class together and then I have a communications class and he has a computer tech class. We will be taking classes Monday, Wednesday and Friday. We will start classes at 8 in the morning (heaven help me) and then Monday we'll stay til five for our movie analysis class and then Wednesday and Friday we will be done by noon. We are very excited!
Just like every night for the past week we had rehearsal, but this night was one of note because the lightning got so bad that we had to stop rehearsal! It was very frightening. I've never seen lightning bolts that huge or that close to me before and we counted in between the lightning and the thunder and it got to about 3 seconds, and according to all of my science classes means that the lightning was about 3 miles away. Scary right!? So that was terrifying!
FRIDAY- August 5, 2011
Friday we went to campus and turned in all of our financial aid forms and I went and talked to VA peeps. And then we came home and then went to rehearsal.
SATURDAY- August 6, 2011
Jon had to open that morning and so I just cleaned in the morning until Jon got home and then we went over to his parents house. Over Memorial Day weekend his parents basement flooded, and so we went over so that Jon could help Rod move some things out of the basement that way they could have someone come over and put the carpet back down. After we were done there we went to rehearsal, and what a FUN rehearsal it was! We had costumes, a full band and almost a full set! It was so much fun to have our costumes and see how we'll feel in them and then also to have our full band! We had such a great time!

Now for today!
Yesterday, I managed to get three mosquito bites on my wedding ring finger. My finger swelled to double it's normal size. I was getting really nervous that I wouldn't be able to get my ring off and that my finger would keep swelling and that I'd have to get my rings cut off! And so I took two benadryl and went to sleep. But by the time that it was time to wake up for church I was not about to! I adamantly told Jon no a couple times before he gave up trying to wake me. Then finally he pursuaded me and we got ready for church. I let him teach the lesson in church and then all of our kids went to YM and YW and so we decided to go home where I promptly took another nap. Then we got up for dinner and then after dinner proceeded to clean up the basement because the Little Sisters of Hoboken were coming over for a photo shoot! And what a fun time we had!! We have pictures of the mustang, the T-Bird, Sister Julia (child of God) in the kitchen, the nuns around the pool and every holiday that you can imagine! I'm only going to put one or two up and everyone should come see the show that opens this Thursday and runs, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Monday! It's at the Clearfield Amphitheatre (right next to the Clearfield Library) and it starts at 7: 30! Although I should probably warn you that it is a bit blasphemous and that you need to come with an open mind and not come in the mind of getting offended. OK? OK!From left to right we have Kathy Lewis as Sister Hubert, Alyn Bone as Mother Superior Mary Regina, Me as Sister Amnesia, Andra Thorne as Sister Robert Anne and Heather Lewis as Sister Mary Leo.

P.S. The ice cream truck came by today and Jon, Nate and I are total sinners and went out to buy an ice cream! And the little boy in the front taking the orders was so funny! While his dad was getting the ice cream for us I asked him if he was having fun and he looked at me with the most intense face and said, "No. Not at All!" It made me laugh! YAY for child labour! ;) I got a Tweety Bird Ice Cream with the blue gumball eyes and Jon got the Batman Ice Cream! It was pretty legit. Except for my ice cream eyes were way out of it!!